Ignominy in Effect
by LegionN7
Summary: A collection of ignominious ends for the hero of our favorite video game series. Read, laugh, review! Now taking requests/suggestions.
1. Ironic Lazarus

**A/N: First of several drabbles of an ignominious end to the great and invincible Commander Shepard. Its parody, laugh! And review!**

**DISCLAIMER: No characters owned by me.**

"Shepard, wake up!"

Miranda could hardly believe it. After two years-and billions of credits-they were _this close_ to fully reintegrating Shepard. And then the 'mechs started painting the staff as targets...

Movement. "You need to get out of there! There's a pistol and armor in the locker across the room."

To his credit, the newly-reactivated Shepard didn't ask questions, scrambling to unsafe the pistol and strap on armor.  
"This pistol doesn't have a thermal clip!" he called.

Well, at least he remembered the weapons retooling before his death.

"Take cover, I'm going to blow the door."

Shepard got behind cover, then took off into the hall, grabbing a fallen guard's thermal clips. "They set up a barricade to keep the 'mechs out..."

Without pause, Shepard vaulted over the obstacle...

Sensor movement.

"Look out!"

Too late. Shepard's head exploded like a melon, and a fusillade of incendiary rounds disintegrated the rest of his body.

"Target neutralized. Patrol mode reinitialized."

The Illusive Man was going to be _most_ displeased.


	2. Traffic

Omega Apartments

"Tell me you'd do anything for me..."

"I'll do... Anything... For... You..."

"Now... Embrace Eternity!"

An unfathomably deep ocean of pleasure surged through Shepard's skull, overloading receptors and causing signals to fire haphazardly, trying to process and store the cyclone. Then, after what seemed like the peak, a new sensation of complete euphoria came over him, every drop of endorphin released into his system. As his life ebbed, he could barely comprehend his surroundings.

"The traffic was, problematic. Forced to slay a drug lord on my way. Now... Oh, Goddess..." Samara watched helplessly as Morinth consumed the last of Shepard's life-energy, the static of malevolent biotic fields snaking around her bare flesh. A human idiom the justicar had heard some of the junior crew use sprang into her mind.

EPIC FAIL


	3. A Jigsaw Puzzle

The Citadel

Feros had been a demanding mission. Hordes of Thorian Creepers, gassing colonists, and dealing with the Thorian at the very end of it... Shepard thought back at his accomplishments, idly picking through the markets for a present to surprise Ash with. Surviving on the rough streets of Earth, living through N-school training, the Skyllian Blitz, and most recently: interfacing with Prothean technology, defeating a Matriarch, and of course, the Thorian.

Looking up from the Haliat shelf, he noticed a familiar face in the corner.

Conrad had seemed like a harmless fanboy, and Shepard truly was trying to look out for him when he had shoved his sidearm roughly into the man's face.  
He appeared troubled, and against logic, Shepard moved to confront him. "Conrad..."

"Oh, you. You don't have to say anything. In fact, I've figured it all out."

The matter-of-fact tone was confusing, to say the least.

"I'm not sure I know what you're talking about, Conrad..."

"You taught me to value my life. I learned that lesson well. Do you value your life?"

The question took Shepard aback. Absently rubbing his shoulder armor, Shepard tried to come up with a response.  
"Well, I, uh, I believe I'm important, but..."

"Well, then, Shepard..." Conrad's face twisted into a malevolent visage. "I want to play a game. Live or die, make your choice!"

He quickly drew two grenades, one a dummy, the other a High Explosive X.

Shepard, shocked at the turn of events, froze for the barest of milliseconds, then drew his pistol and shot Conrad in the gut. As he expired, Conrad muttered,

"Game over...".

Then the deadman switch went off.


	4. Fallen Angel

Omega

"You're working too hard." Shepard electrocuted the lazy batarian, then ran to join the flood of merc mooks crossing the bridge.

Archangel, last surviving member of his hit squad watched through the scope as the fodder poured over the barricade. He sighted down on the idiots quickly, taking them down speedily. One in particular caught his eye: dressed in military grade armor, leading a woman and a grizzled man. Figuring they would cause the most trouble, Garrus readied an AP round and sighted.

"Oh come on, its not like he's going to shoot ME..."

The projectile caught him on the bridge of the nose, then continued through frontal lobe and midbrain, finally obliterating the brain stem while exiting the back if Shepard's skull.

Zaeed turned to Miranda.

"I better get my goddam' money your Illusive Man promised."


	5. Recalculating

Therum

The bay doors opened, and the launch arm gracefully shoved the Mako out into atmosphere.  
As the ground rose up to meet them, cushioning thrusters kicked in and the eezo core adjusted their net mass to allow for a soft descent. Finally on the ground, Shepard and his team pulled up the navigation interface.

"Looks pretty straightforward. Around a few hairpins and over to the dig site."

"Shepard, we've got a slight issue"...

"Yeah, Kaidan? This better not be another emotional breakdown."

"Optical emulators are glitched... Most of the surface has no texture."

Rubbing his temples at the idiocy of the Mako, Shepard said, "Don't worry about it too much. I'm sure dangerous stuff would still show up. We should go."  
The drove off, and saw a detachment of geth platforms ahead.

"So if we follow the lines on the map, we'd be spotted before we could give accurate counter-fire..."

"Only a fool punches a nathak in the mouth," Wrex growled, "I say come up through that ditch."

"It does appear that there's nothing dangerous that way," Kaidan observed.

"Finally, something not feelings related..."

"I feel like its a bad idea, Shepard. I'm in tune with my feelings. You should keep a feelings journal, Shepard."

Shepard gave Kaidan a blank stare. "Never say that again".

With that, he pointed the Mako towards the ditch, and subsequently into a lava pit.

As the searing heat built up in the crew compartment, cooking them like garbage can turkeys on a campout, Shepard looked at Kaidan with tears in his eyes and said, "I would have gone gay for you..."

Kaidan, who's eyes were completely boiled, croaked out "Wheres my feelings journal?"

And Wrex, hungry due to impending doom, started to consume Kaidan.


	6. Nihilism

Normandy SR-1

"Send Shepard back here to speak with me"

"He's on his way. Oh, watch out, Nihlus is headed back there as well."

"I'm already here, Lieutenant."

Kaidan chuckled. Bastard.

Shepard turned to leave.

Joker looked around, then whispered to Kaidan, "Wanna see something hilarious?"

Rolling his eyes, Kaidan said, "What is it, Joker?"

Grinning wildly, Joker said "its a selective translator bug. Its going to mistranslate what Shepard says to Nihlus."

Raising an eyebrow, Kaidan cautioned, "Its not going to torpedo our relations, is it?"

"Naw, that's the Shanxi Revenge version. I have that one, too, but im pretty sure i just loaded the 'lavatorial humor' version. Check this out, its a live feed, with what he's saying, and what the turian's hearing!"

Having talked to Dr. Chakwas (and that hotheaded farmboy who probably wouldnt last long), Shepard walked into the comm room, to find Nihlus standing alone, sans Anderson.

"Commander Shepard, glad you came."

"Like I wanted to see your sickly waist and mediocre fringe (Where's Anderson? I thought I'd be speaking to both of you)?"

Eyes flaring slightly, Nihlus nonetheless continued. "Are you aware of my agenda here?"

"I'm aware that your colony markings look like the result of three failed abortion attempts (I knew this was more than a simple shakedown)."  
Mandibles flaring, Nihlus tried to stem his rising ire.

"I'm here to judge your candidacy to the Spectres. What do you know about them?"

"I know that you became one by blowing Valern, being submissive for Tevos, and having multiple deviant encounters with Sparatus. Your skills are best suited to a children's game of duck, duck, goose because your mother was the Palaven equivalent of a duck, and your father smelt of elderberries (From what I've heard, they are highly skilled agents. They operate at the behest of the Council and above the law)."

Growling now, clenching and unclenching his talons, Nihlus ground out, "Commander, do you think this is some kind of grand joke?"

Confused, Shepard replied, "There are no Spirits but Baphomet, Zeus, and Ra; your military couldn't hold off a single biotic volus (I'm a marine, I don't take opportunities lightly; please believe me)!"

Mandibles wide apart, Nihlus seethed "Commander, one more attack on me, my species, or anything negative will result in consequences!"

As soon as the explanation as to how Nihlus became favored of the Council happened, Kaidan raised an eyebrow.

"Joker, are you SURE that this is the harmless version?"

Starting to sweat now, Joker checked the software logs. "Shit! Must've hit the wrong executable. I'll scrub it, but Shepard just needs to stay quiet for another..."

"30 seconds, Commander. Apologize now!"

"Your lineage is tainted by poorly-shielded reprobates, mentally deficient pleasure workers, diseased vagrants, and cowardly cannon fodder (please help me understand what the hell is going on here)?!"

With a bellow of rage, Nihlus jumped into range of Shepard, and in a practiced and fluid manner, drew his ceremonial blade in a diagonal kill-draw. The vibrating serrated edges bit into the cheap standard-issue armor and opened Shepard's abdomen.

"Whew! Should NOT have eaten that extra taco MRE at mess. Now where were... What the HELL?!"


	7. Impact Event

Tartarus Debris Field

"Deceleration in 3, 2, 1..."

Shepard felt the rush of excitement in his gut. Here it was, a few months and thousands of rounds later. The chance to neutralize the Collector threat.

"Oh, shit!" Joker cursed.

Looking at the massive piece of debris approaching, Shepard wondered why they didn't send a drone through first.


	8. Reaper Rage

Tuchanka

"Hurry up, Shepard! Activate the second hammer!"

"There's a REAPER in my way, Wrex!"

Running full tilt to the second maw hammer, Shepard hardly noticed the Brute that got kicked by the reaper. It flew into another Brute, which squished a Ravager, which spewed acid onto a rock pillar.

"I'm at the second ha-"

The ancient pillar fell over, pinning Shepard to the ground and destroying the hammer.

Shepard looked up to see a gargantuan metal 'foot' descending rapidly.


	9. Big Stupid Jellyfish

Presidium

"Why won't this hanar abide by the rules?"

"Because its a big, stupid jellyfish!"

"Pardon me, but this one believes you are a big, dead fleshbag."

As the tentacles started the deadly twist, a bit of the N4 diplomacy training came to mind: 'Never call hanar "jellyfish" within "earshot". It translates into a very potent insult.'


	10. Choke This Down!

SR-2 Mess Hall

"Here, try a bite!"

Gardner held out the ladle of calamari gumbo for Shepard to try, looking like a puppy wanting to get attention.

Shepard just thought to himself, 'Oh, what the hell!' and consumed the offering.

A bit of spice hit the back of his throat, causing him to cough involuntarily. As his trachea opened, some okra and squid lodged in. Now panicking, Shepard couldn't draw any air in to cough the food out.

Gardner, Hawthorn, and Hadley (none of which do anything productive) sprang to help him. Dr. Chakwas ran out of the medbay, but couldn't perform a Heimlich on an armored man.

By the time they figured out his armor releases, Shepard was gone.

"Well, hell. One less mouth to feed!" Gardner joked lamely.

Nobody laughed.


	11. Shepard's Swag

**A/N: I'd like to thank all those who have favorited and followed: KasumiCain, 672560, Inkess, .79, Patient131071, and The Grinning Psychopath. I'd also like to thank Inkess, KasumiCain, and The Grinning Psychopath for the reviews. Keep reading!**

Rannoch

"Just stay down, Legion._ I got this_."

"Shepard-Commander... Good luck"

"Acknowledged! Go!"

Shepard swaggered up to the edge and began to lase the reaper. Feeling extremely cocky, he began playing a high-energy instrumental piece over his armor speakers.

"I can ROLL, bitch!" he shouted at the reaper who kept lasing the area.

One, two, three volleys, and the reaper was looming directly above Shepard. In a seemingly time-dilated sequence, the reaper started powering its killing beam, pointed at Shepard, who steadily held his targeting laser.

An increased-volume flurry of kinetic rounds chewed into the structure of the reaper. It pointed its firing chamber upward, like a turkey in the rain, and got beaten down.

"Shepard..." the reaper began.

"Shut up, dumbass!" Shepard didnt want to put up with a monologue with a mook Reaper.

"You are doooooomed!"

The firing chamber pulsed one last time, channeling the remaining power into a focused magnetohydrodynamic stream- which nailed Shepard even as he was repainting the vulnerable reaper.

"Creator Tali'Zorah, we do not understand. Why did Shepard-Commander refer to the Old Machine as both a Terran canine and pack-animal?"


	12. Missile Dance

Earth

Dodging banshees, brutes, cannibals, husks, Shepard made a mad run for the second Thanix missile truck. As he set his fingers on the haptic aerogel, the cold agony of a Banshee's claws speared into a kidney...

His last thought was 'If only it were Morinth, I'd be ENJOYING this...'

Because cutscenes only work in videogames.


	13. Breach in the Darkness

Despoina

The Triton smoothly bound through the frigid depths, seeking the mysterious creature that had led Shepard on a merry chase.

He checked the pressure indicator, it was hovering near danger but nowhere near crush.

Then suddenly a leg caught on a rock, pitching the Triton forward. The viewpanel connected solidly with a coral analogue, opening a microfracture.

That was all that was needed for a hyperpressurized jet if water to shoot in and slice through Shepard.

Meanwhile on the surface:

Cortez couldn't stand it much longer. No word from Shepard in over 36 hours. The Triton would have run out of power 2 hours ago.

"So, Kaidan..."


	14. Damn Elevators

Ilos

"Look at all these pods..."

"They must have tried to hide from the reapers in cryostasis."

Shepard could scarcely belive it. An underground bunker, filled with Prothean remnants. The elevator seemed so insignificant next to the majesty...*THUMP*

"WHAT the hell?!" Shepard barked after regaining his composure.

"I believe the elevator track has deteriorated over the last 50000 years..." Tali pointed out.

"Feelings journal entry 9453. Shock, awe, and nervousness..." Kaidan blabbered on into his omnitool.

"Soooo... How do we get where we were-"

Shepard never got to finish the sentence. The weight of three armed and armored crew shifting about on the crumbled piece of track caused it to give way.

As the three fell, Shepard reached out, trying to cop a last feel...


	15. Nerfed!

Freedom's Progress

"This thing's going to be a bitch to take out!" Miranda huffed, sliding into cover.

The YMIR finished having its way with Prazza's squad, then started seeking new targets.

"Miranda, haven't you heard of a save editor? I've fully developed my biotic charge! Watch this!"

"Shepard, wait!" Jacob tried to stop the vanguard to explain the concept of mechanics and balancing, but couldnt stop the charge.

Shepard rammed the YMIR, but only took down some shields.

As the accelerator arm rose level with his face, Shepard recalled too late he had increased his level instead of only talent points...


	16. Omega Fail

Omega

"Go... Shepard!"

Aria held the field open, not an unimpressive feat. Shepard leapt through... kicking Aria, breaking her concentration, and causing the field to close on his body.

Nyreen dropped her shotgun. "I quit."


	17. Addictions

**A/N Yes I'm still writing these! But if anyone has any ideas for settings/situations, I'll gladly listen... Also, I like to reference my own work, so go ahead and read Fornax Stories... if you dare...**

Zakera Ward

Shepard silently walked through the Ward, desperately trying to get to that one cafe. His stock of Fornax was stale, and the new issue had some drell-on-yahg and elcor-on-raloi he was craving. Just a hundred more yards...

"You heard wrong. This is the best place for food on the _whole damn Citadel_!"

Was that turian coot still at it? Geez, some people needed a shot in the foot. 50 yards, the 'special' holo rack was in sight. His hands shook, palms sweaty, filled with the need to acquire...

"Whatever man, I'm out. Just gimme that VorchTorch copy."

"You humans are sick! That copy contains the dephallusment of a batarian!

"And somehow you knew that."

Shepard finally made it to the book counter, twitching in anticipation, then thumbed aside copies of Consexus, Deception, and GenitElcor... THERE! Fornax Exotic Issue 2186, now just...

"Your momma likes my reach. Her waist is VERY supportive."

"Your sister likes my flexibi- wait..."

Shepard tried to shoulder aside the belligerent human who was trying to make a good comeback, a half-rush of dopamine flooding his system...  
His mistake, he realized too late, was not noticing the shotgun the belligerent turian was holding. the sudden movement caused the shopkeeper to open fire, obliterating Shepard and the customer.

"Hmph. These humans are all racist."

As Shepard's vision went red and stringy at the edges, he finally got the point.

ADDICTIONS KILL.


	18. Arrival Delayed?

Bahak System

"Joker, hit that relay NOW! Before the asteroid actually hits it!"

Shepard ran into the cockpit to oversee the hasty departure. Because commanding from the CIC, the whole point of the Normandy's design, is too mainstream.

As he ran, a leg muscle spasmed, pitching him forward. A sudden gust of ions from the asteroid shook the Normandy, dipping the nose sharply. Shepard careened into the pilot's console, kicking Joker in the head on the way down.  
While struggling against the physical console, Shepard's implants communicated with the haptic controls, cancelling the jump, overrode the safeties, and pointed the nose straight into the massive eezo core... At least the Reapers were delayed... 


	19. Deadly Driving

Feros

Careening back out to reach the colony, Shepard swerved the Mako wildly to avoid Colossus and Armature fire. Crawling up the deteriorating barrier wall, then throwing two wheels off the edge, Shepard careened into geth lines, destroying trooper and rocketeer platforms as he went.  
Ashley finally had enough.

"Commander, give.. me... the... wheel!" she grated out between violent jostles.

Shepard, too adrenalin pumped to take her seriously looked over. "Now if you asked for the JOYSTICK..."

Kaidan yelled "Look out!" just as an Armature bolt slammed into the vehicle, dropping the shields significantly.

"Damn clankers... I'll show that sonofabitch..." Shepard revved the Mako for all it was worth, intending to ram the platform.

"Feelings journal, entry..."

"SHUT UP!" Came the dual reply from Ash and Shepard.

Kaidan defiantly whispered his entry.

Meanwhile, the first physical impact slammed everyone forward violently, restraints digging into the armor joints.

"Only one more..." Shepard muttered. He backed up and went full speed ahead.

Into the geth.

And over the side.

Shepard gave Ash a leer, and somehow started unstrapping armor.

"Thirty seconds to live, go!


	20. Red Herring? Blue Herring

**Dear readers, I have received your suggestions, and will credit you accordingly as soon as the chapter inspired by you is published!**

**Until then, thank you for reviewing so doggedly, reading these stupid things :D**

Shepard stepped in front of the star brat, listened to it go on and on... then finally he had a choice. He figured genocide sounded pretty cool so he shot the power module, advancing for some unknown reason when he could have just stood still and shot it.

Then he shot the star brat when it was too late to change the cutscene.

As the energy was released, beams, panels of flooring, and other materials rained down like rain upon the broken and bloodied commander. Listening to the beautiful piano music that heralded the tears of a million gamers, he felt the heat as the section of the Citadel, the once proud political center of the galaxy, plummeted to Earth.

Amazingly, he survived re-entry, most likely due to the Cerberus implants.

Rescue crews found him, and after a long bout of recovery time, where he had no way to receive pleasure except very occasional Liara visits- but he was in a full body cast and could only meld then anyway-. So he borrowed some surgical tubing and... Nope, he didn't die somehow, and made a full recovery.

He bonded with Liara, who continued Shadow Brokering, even during 'fun nights' It was all very kinky, delivering information of an assassination while assassinating a certain waffle in turn.

In any case, one day Shepard had been drinking, and (NEVER DO THIS) stole a hovercar and took it down the freeway. He survived the encounter and never even got a ticket. (STILL, NEVER DO THIS).

Later, when he was in his 90s, he hobbled into the shower with Liara and got sponge bathed. It wasn't very kinky now as he had old man smell and needed his diapers changed along with a full breakfast of 35 pills, and a wholesome dinner of 42 each day.

So they embraced eternity in the shower, but she noticed he wasn't moving, so she broke the embrace, and got pulled down. He had died with lockjaw around her nipple. She had to warp his jaw to remove it.

And thus ended the heroic life of Commander Shepard- gripping on to whatever obsessed him at the time.


	21. Dread, 'Tis all for Nought

Geth Dreadnought

Running through the main gun, Shepard wildly searched for another maintenance exit. _There it is! _

Sudden;y, the atmosphere became charged with ions and a light began growing. Shouting at Tali and Kaidan to get out of the shaft, he took one last look and jumped. And smacked into the closed hatch.

The projectile was released.


	22. Singularity Sling

**This was a requested scenario!**

Hagalaz

Fighting the Shadow Broker's forces that were swarming across the hull was becoming more and more difficult while fighting towards an edge.

A group of soldiers and an engineer were blocking the way now.

Shepard gripped his rifle, and shouted "Cover me!", intending to charge. But Liara, focused only on defeating the forces, couldn't hear him over the howling winds, and loosed a singularity.

Right in Shepard's path.

Shepard was flung into the air and caught in a crosscurrent, and violently flew off the safety of the hull and to the now-boiling ocean just behind the ship.

"Error 666. Shepard-Commander is dead. Uploading runtimes. Deleting archive. Deactivating platform."


	23. Live By the Sword

**Idea provided by Taupe Two. Go read her amazing humor fic "Well, What About Shepard?"**

Vancouver

"Out of shots! We'll have to take them out the old-fashioned way!"

Shepard was already on it, rushing the husks on the veranda and charging up his new omniblade program.

He stabbed straight through the first two without issue.

"This thing is _sweet!"_

He opened the door and a husk got half-caught in the door, Shepard backed up reflexively, and opening the blade once more, charged the offending husk.

Anderson had overridden the door safety, however, and the doors shut, squishing the Reaper troop. Unfortunately, Shepard careened into the door, bending his right arm inward. The force pushed his blade right into his gut, tearing him up.

Anderson, seeing this, shook his head and found the nearest husk. "Take me to your leader!"


	24. Drunk Descent

**Idea credit to The Grinning Psychopath**

Shepard plunged farther still in the Triton, finally approaching the beacon. He worked the controls to feather over to a landing...

And fell through a kelp-like ledge.

Cursing, he attempted to land on the next one, but he misjudged the approach and missed it entirely.

"May as well..." He brought up the bottle of Serrice Ice brandy he stole from Chakwas and somehow had in his armor. He twisted the cap off with his cybernetic-enhanced strengh and chugged the bottle.

"Well, it would appear I still have a signal..."

Brain muddling from the alcohol intake and heightening pressure, he began composing several emails.

TO: HOTFEELINGSGUY

MSG: Hey Kaidy, we need to read Strawberries together...

TO: Maskedboshtet

MSG: Lol ur ugly wish I nevr hugged u on Alarei

TO: MILFDOC

MSG: LOLOLOL I stol ur alkohall

TO: SlampieceShadowBroker

MSG: Do u kno what im doing to that holo of u right nao? ROFLMAO

TO: JackassPilot

MSG: Dont break your good bone on EDI...

TO: AdmiralHackett

MSG: If I werent in for Kaidybear, Id want you in my cabin...

Then the cockpit burst and hyperpressurized water sliced into the legend.


	25. Brutish End

**Idea credit to The Grinning Psychopath**

Cold.

Burning.

Fatigue.

Its what Shepard felt as he stumbled out of the Triton's cockpit and onto the heaving deck of the ship.

"Shepard!" His wafflebearer had seen him and was running to assist...

And the two fighting brutes grappled and rolled onto him, metal claws making short work of his armor.


	26. Bob the Leviathan

**Idea credit to The Grinning Psychopath**

"Get us outta here!"

"Yes, Commander!" Cortez brought the shuttle online and took off...

"Youre sure they deactivated the pulse field?"

"Theyre on our side no-"

He was cut off as the wall of energy slammed into them , ripping the Kodiak apart and spilling them into the vast unforgiving sea.

MEANWHILE:

"Bob, what the hell! We said turn OFF the pulse generator!"


	27. Bob the Leviathan 2

**Idea credit to The Grinning Psychopath**

"Reaper above us!" Cortez's voice was slightly tinged with anxiety as the Reaper plunged into the wet atmosphere, arms extending and laser chamber pulsing...

Below the surface, the Leviathans pulsed out and assumed control of the abomination, instantly deactivating it...

And the dead Reaper fell onto the shuttle, swatting it from the sky as though it were a gnat.

"Liara... Blow me baby one more time!"

MEANWHILE:

"Bob, what the hell! You were supposed to wait until they evaded!"

"But you said..."

"Shut up!"


	28. All I Wanted Was Sushi

**Sorry for the long delay, I've been focusing mainly on the collab project Galactic Life, and Reapers- found on my profile. I will have more substantial Ignominy chapters soon, and remember: Ideas and requests are always appreciated! Let yours be known in a review!**

"Joker! Go find the crew and warn them!"

"Right away!" The man limped off, drawing the attention of one of the unknown assailants, Allowing Shepard to jump up and disarm him, then slam his omniblade through the man.

"You were using me as bait!" Joker accused.

Checking the Suppressor, Shepard chuckled. "Yes I w-"

He had stood up without checking for snipers... and formalwear doesn't do much against a mass accelerator round.


End file.
